Monday, October 21, 2013

Am I an Adult?

I mean, that's a stupid question...clearly I am an adult.

But I don't always feel like one. Or, I don't always feel like I always assumed an adult would feel like. More likely, I just always assumed that adults felt more responsible and capable than they really did...

I have no idea what the point of this is, other than it being a thought that crossed my mind yesterday. I'm 31, I am married, I have two(plus) kids and a prestigious graduate degree. As compared to an average American, I make a ton of money and own an extremely valuable home. I am a responsible, voting, tax-paying member of society.

In other words, I can't really argue that I am NOT an adult. It's just that, well, I rarely feel like I am!

I still wonder (often) how on Earth someone let me have children. Do you have any idea how responsible and clear-headed parents have to be??!? How can I possibly be that kind of person? Can someone that responsible get sucked into Real World/Road Rules Challenge Marathons? Of course not!!!

I've known adults all my life...some who were clearly NOT upstanding, tax-paying, productive members of society. But they still seemed a whole lot more mature and serious than I do. My Mother, for example, was a drunk and spent almost her entire adult life on public assistance...and there are a lot of people that are much less productive than even she was. But I bet they can all buy a cucumber without finding it awkward (I can't...sorry!).

Whenever I meet other parents my age, I always think of them as being older than me, and having their shit more together. Other day care parents? Most of them probably are a couple of years older than me, but not dramatically...and yet I assume that they are all just so much more, well, adult than I am. I am fully aware that this is an absurdly illogical idea, but I can't help but think it.

Maybe this is not a bad thing...maybe I am just viewing myself as staying young (says the girl who was in bed by 9:00 both nights this weekend). Or, possibly I am just delusionally clinging to a youth that is long gone. I suppose those are both kind of just different reads on the same thing:-)

Anyway, I have absolutely no point. I guess I just found myself yesterday thinking that I am probably a whole lot older than I think of myself!

1 comment:

A said...

You know how when you're in high school and your teacher is 25 and they seem old? But then you're 25 and you realize that they were clueless? I'm pretty sure all of life is like that until you're, like, the oldest person alive.