Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Attack of the Obtuse

Kind of a silly story that serves no real purpose other than to highlight the stupidity of one random person who's name I don't even remember (Bobby? Benny? Something like that).

This happened last Friday night when I was out in Chicago with the BFF's and some old friends. Yesterday's post was too long, so I didn't include this, but I wanted to because it is funny. I have another part of the weekend to include tomorrow which is less funny, but in the interest of keeping posts to one mood...I will hold that out for a day.

Anyway, after dinner we went to a little bar to hang out. Kind of a dive...not too loud, cheap beer, everyone was in a pretty good mood. Somehow, I met Blockhead, a cute, nice, charming guy who had trouble picking up obvious messages. I think that maybe one of his friends knew one of my friends or something along those lines, I am not real sure how it came about.

But we got to talking...I seem to make lots of friends in bars...and he was really nice. However, it was pretty clear that he was trying to pick me up. He laughed a little too loud at my jokes, found excuses to touch my arm, seemed a little overly interested in anything I had to say... So I did what I feel like is the responsible social thing to do, which is to say the word "Boyfriend" a lot.

I am certain that I mentioned having a boyfriend at least five times... he said he liked my shirt and I said "Oh thanks, my boyfriend bought it for me," or "Oh, I don't really follow basketball. My boyfriend took me to a game this winter, but that is the only one I have been to." I will talk to anyone that I think is interesting, but I don't want anyone getting any mistaken ideas if I can help it.

Anyway, it was kinda weird. I just kinda felt all night like he was still actively trying to pick me up. I dunno...maybe he heard I was a slut:-), maybe he figured there was a chance I would lose the inhibitions since I was on vacation, or maybe he was just dumb. But he kept trying to buy me drinks (seriously...if you ask "Do you need a drink?" more than twice, you are overdoing it...25 times is just awkward) and he spent like three straight hours sitting or standing right next to me.

Again, I didn't really mind it...he was funny and interesting and not at all a bad person to hang out with. He just really didn't seem to be picking up the messages that I wasn't looking to take someone home. [For the record...if I am interested in taking someone home with me, there will be very little room for misinterpretation of intentions]. Heck, I called The Boy from the bar while he was sitting right next to me! And, I went maybe a little overboard on the "I love you and I miss you" part, just for show.

He did get a little overly flirtatious to where it started to become uncomfortable, but that was kind of right when we were getting ready to leave. And then...he totally had a tantrum! He was honestly, seriously pissed that I was leaving and not staying to hang out with him. And he tried to get my number, made some veiled accusations that I was leading him on and yada, yada, yada.

At first I was just trying to be nice, and went with "Well, the BFF's are leaving and they are my ride home," and then when he offered to drive me later on, I added "I have to get up early anyway, I have a breakfast date with my sister." And he was still giving me some weird attitude about it, so I was maybe a little more forceful about it (:-D).

And...well, I don't really even know how to describe it because it was all so very weird. But he was definitely having some bizarre tantrum over it. Weird enough that when we left the bar, BFFb was wondering if he had missed something I said, because all he heard all night were the oh-too-obvious boyfriend hints.

So, that is my story. I guess the upside is that BFFb didn't go back in and throw the kid over the bar...he must be maturing;-)

4 comments:

Still just me said...

That is the reason I stay away from bars, with me being married. Most of the men in this area of Colorado who try to pick you up in bars DO NOT CARE if you are already attached. It's a game to them.

Scott said...

I don't get some guys. Sometimes I think they have no clue, and sometimes I think that they think they actually have a chance.

Kate said...

silly boys. but at least he didn't get fresh with you. i've had complete strangers walk up to me in bars and put their hands all over me. stunned, i tell you. i don't know what people are thinking anymore.

Princess Extraordinaire said...

Blockhead sounds about right.....